Dear fashion world,
You’ve done some pretty weird things in the past. And I’m not just talking about foot binding, head flattening, rib removal, and all the other acts of self-mutilation that people have done in the name of beauty. Humans have generally had a history of strange but true fashion facts. Hindsight is 20/20 and applying our modern ideas to way-back-when is an exercise in futility.
I’m not even talking about the deep v-neck top on men, double denim, and any number of styles that made it into the Bad Fads Museum in recent history.
Frankly, this time you’ve gone too far. Not only have you slaughtered a number of innocent muppets but you’ve also clearly ripped off styles from the Mushroom Kingdom (Attention: King Koopa has sent some of his minions to collect royalties). Oh, and let’s not forget about Hello Kitty makeup. In case you didn’t notice, she’s naturally cute and doesn’t need to gussy herself up with paraben-filled, cancer-causing beauty products.
Handbags, roll out!
What’s next, fashion world?
Louis Vuitton Transformers handbags?
Carebear belts?
My Little Pony hair extensions?
What other childhood icon have you not yet pillaged?
How about you just stick to making clothes that I can wear to work? (Note: I do not work in an amusement park.)
Irritably yours,
Kimberly
Kimberly Walsh is a social media and online community manager. You can follow her on Twitter @AliasGrace.
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
Hilarious post! And that handbag is an absolute sin.
I kind of love this. And kind of loved the Hello Kitty make-up. Then again, I have the emotional and intellectual maturity of a six year-old.
Danielle: Thanks. I couldn’t help making the handbag when I thought of how ridiculous it would look..!
Racquel: I have to admit an affinity for Hello Kitty but I thought the make-up kind of besmirched the childhood innocence of the famous Sanrio feline. Then again, the market has produced thong underwear for little girls now so what do I know about what constitutes childhood innocence these days?
How about Halo Spa T-shirts or Gears of War yoga pants.
Gifted: That would be pretty funny. It might be difficult finding nirvana while sporting that outfit.
I’m kinda stuck at outraged over those damned pants for four year olds that say JUICY across the back….hello, asking them to grow up a little fast?
That make-up ad was trippy.
daysgoby: Thanks for stopping by the blog! Yeah, I’m totally on the same page as you about the fashion world crossing a line especially when it comes to sexuality and young girls. Those Bratz dolls are like fashion’s horsemen of the apocalypse if you ask me.
Kimberly-
I wandered here form your post on cougars. My comment is a little outdated, but did you ever see this pic of Lady Gaga in the kermit outfit?
http://tinyurl.com/lkrbrh
Shannon: No, I hadn’t seen that before…as if she’s not scary enough!